questions & answers

(circa 1am)

Q: Where does a single 20-something spend her paycheck?
A: grocery store, gas pump, laundromat, farmer's market, Sonic happy hour, cable TV/internet

Q: Where does a grown-up find friends?
A: EVERYWHERE! loose the chains that bind you!

Q: Who are a graduate student's friends?
A: classmates, coworkers, elderly women, young children, customers who frequent your place of employment, anyone who breathes and doesn't mention Chaucer (because he's SO last degree program -- if the Duchess is reading this, don't worry, I'm kidding! sort of.)

Q: Tell us about having company in your home.
A: First of all, I make sure all misplaced items look like they know where they belong. Then I sweep the floor, ensure that the toilet paper isn't empty, and finish by washing a few of the dishes in the sink and setting them out to dry. In the meantime, a scented candle is burning to cover the smell of stir-fry from last night. When the guests arrive, I welcome them into my clean and cozy home and warmly receive their complements on the ambient lighting. We engage in friendly conversation over coffee and midterm study guides.

Q: What's it like not having a roommate?
A: quiet evenings alone with a book, scented candles, and a warm cup of herbal tea -OR- afternoons eavesdropping on the neighbors while draping half-dried laundry from the doors, curtain rods, countertops, etc. with the door open and fans turned on high -OR- early mornings running madly through the apartment looking for matching items of clothing while choking down a cold pop-tart and being as loud as possible

Q: Do you use your kitchen daily?
A: No. I get free meals when I'm on the clock. However, I make up for missed days by cooking two-hour bowls of stir-fry and baking all-afternoon loaves of zucchini bread. One day I'll be a speed chef.

Q: Do you spontaneously combust and/or dance?
A: I'm training to become a cage-fighter. Does that answer your question?

Q: When one lights a jar candle, it melts (of course). Over time the amount of wax in the jar diminishes noticeably. Where does the wax go?
A: