inFLUenza

I had a new experience this week: The Flu.

It all started last weekend, when I noticed my voice slowly slipping away like a falling star, fading into the night sky... By Sunday morning I could barely talk, and my body hurt all over. I had worked an 8-hour catering shift Friday night, and had spent some time at the gym Saturday, so it made sense for me to be sore. Sunday night I huddled in a shivering pile of blankets with my heating pad alternating between sore neck and achy thighs. Then I had a temperature of 102.1.

Monday morning I was determined NOT to be sick, and credited the heating pad with my elevated temperature. I slept a few extra hours, then went about my daily business with a water bottle and a bag of cough drops. I had almost made it through my night class on Language Evaluation, when suddenly a chill hit me and the only thing on my mind was getting home before I collapsed.

Tuesday I ventured over to the infirmary, where Our Lady Of Divine Compassion, R.N. pronounced me untreatable and sent me home with an envelope of Benadryl. Predicting the worst, I then made a tour of all the drug stores in town until finally I found my flavor of TheraFlu at Wal-Mart. I also got a big box of anti-viral kleenex (I didn't think this was a time to be cheap) and some chicken noodle soup.

Wednesday I woke up desperate for relief. I was running a steady fever, could barely talk above a whisper, and heard everything as if through the bell jar. Not knowing where to find a doctor, I quickly logged into facebook and begged someone from church to tell me what to do. At the ExpressHealth Clinic (located conveniently inside the pharmacy behind the ship shop store) I was informed that the doctor was full until after the lunch break. 3 hours later, I returned and put my name on the walk-in list, and after another 2 hours I was finally called back. I don't know if you've ever spent much time in the waiting room of a walk-in clinic, but it's a sort of gathering place for all of a town's most obnoxious and smart-mouthed children and their loose-lipped mothers... almost as bad as the health department.

Being a confirmed flu patient, I was sent home with prescription cough syrup and 2-3 more days of waiting. FYI: the anti-viral can only be administered within 48 hours of first symptoms. My parents and sister, who were supposed to be coming up so we could go skiing, instead spent the next two days nursing me back to health and playing nintendo with me between naps.

I am now enjoying some delicious homemade potato soup and another day of Lifetime and Hallmark movies. After 7 full days of illness, my fever has been replaced by a fluorescent green ooze erupting from my nose and chest. I look and feel like a corroded battery -- crusty, disgusting, and absolutely no energy to do anything useful.

Next year I'm getting a flu shot.